Typically, I use exercise as a tool to pick myself up if I feel down. Some days, its not that easy.
I can’t lie, there are some days now where I don’t feel like myself. It’s related to being trapped in a routine where I can’t move freely at my own will. So it’s been tough.
While I do love the work I am caught up with right now, I am itching to get into a more productive realm of my life, and start moving my plans forward. But recently, I have been feeling the weight of my plans not coming into play as soon as I wish they would.
Lately I’ve been learning how to discipline myself, and I believe a strong part of that is knowing when to take the discipline off and give yourself, instead, a dose of self-care.
Self-care is reminding yourself that you also exist to sense the things around you. Get a good, dark cup of coffee. Live in the cup of coffee, at least for a few minutes. Self-care is reminding yourself that your life isn’t meant to be entirely work. We get married to our work and our skills easily, and I have to remind myself that my worth isn’t defined by how much I’m doing in my career at this moment.
I have been, instead, rebuilding my body to be stronger, healthier, and more useful than before. I can’t help but wonder if this is where I’m meant to be in this moment. Would I be able to heal if I were working?
I don’t fully understand it, but perhaps I should try not to and just exist. In the meantime, there are endorphins.